Welcome to my Life
by x-StarshineWeirdo-x
Summary: A Songfic to Simple Plan's Welcome to My Life BeastBoy tried to help Raven trust the world a little more, and Raven soon sees the best comfort can be a close friend. Added sequal Songfic Can't Take It To the story. BBRae
1. Welcome to my Life

Welcome To My Life

(A/n: I don't own raven, BB, or any of the titans… They belong to DC comics and their other creators…)

"Raven! Come on, were all going out for Pizza? Wanna Come?"

I look angrily at the door. I just wanted him to go away, so badly! He's been bugging me now for the past few days to go places with the others, to actually have fun with the others and actually enjoy myself for once. That's not too much to ask any other person in the world, but it is for me.

_Do you ever feel like breaking down?  
Do you ever feel out of place?  
Like somehow you just don't belong  
And no one understands you_

They will never understand anything about me… they can't! How do they expect me, Raven, mistress of all things dark actually have fun for once. "No thanks."

"Aww, come on Raven! It will be fun, plus, it would be nice to get out of that old stuffy room, wouldn't it?"

This old stuffy room is actually keeping me sane right now. I swear I wanted to kill him right them and there.

"No, thanks!"

"C'mon Raven! Can't you do this one little thing for the team? Can't you for once in your life, RELAX! Why do you always do this, Raven? Why can't you ever be _normal!?_

I turned up the music that I was listening too. I wanted to yell and scream and cry, but I couldn't. I show no emotion, I feel no emotion. I would rather die then cry.

_  
Do you ever wanna runaway?  
Do you lock yourself in your room?  
With the radio on turned up so loud  
but no one hears you screaming  
  
_

"Go Away…" I open up my own little world called a book and start reading some more. I can't hear BeastBoy anymore. Maybe he finally gave up, or the music is too loud that I can't even hear him.

"I wish I could understand what you're going through, Raven! I wish I could help you, but you won't let me help you! You won't let anyone help you. Why are you so stubborn!?"

Stubborn? Who's being stubborn? If anyone was stubborn, it was him. He will never understand me, he will never get it through his tiny little brain what it was like to be me.

_  
No you don't know what it's like  
When nothing feels all right  
You don't know what it's like  
To be like me  
  
_

I sat there staring at the door. Silence. Finally! I can actually get back to my book! I wish I had something more comforting then a stupid book.

BANGBANG

Next thing I knew my door was blown off its hinges and BeastBoy was standing there, glaring at me. I glared right back, and tried to get my door back on. "Can't you take a stupid hint!? I DON'T WANT TO GO ANYWHERE!!!!!"

"Raven, I've had enough of your pity act! I wish I could know everything about you, but you won't let me!"

"Duh! You think I open up to just anyone!?"

"You opened up to Starfire, didn't you?"

I rolled my eyes and looked back down at my book. "That was different."

Next thing I knew my book was torn out from my hands and flung across the room. I stared at my hands and looked over to the floor where my book lay, with the pages torn and bent. __

_  
To be hurt  
To feel lost  
To be left out in the dark  
To be kicked when you're down  
To feel like you've been pushed around_

"Why did you do that?" I put my hands into fists and shot him a look that would probably make him turn tail it out of my room. He didn't budge.

"To try and get through to you! I hate you sometimes, Raven! I wish, I wish you were different…. I wish you weren't you."

_  
To be on the edge of breaking down  
But no one's there to save you  
No you don't know what it's like  
Welcome to my life_

"You hate me, huh? Well, maybe you should make a fan club or something. I'll even join if you want me too." I raised my hand as a huge black power gathered in my hands. I shot energy at him, enough to knock him out of my room, but he had to make it harder. He yelled and transformed himself into a Tyrannosaurus Rex and held his ground. He broke through and caused me to fly back on my bed, headfirst into some pillows.

"Raven, are you okay?" _  
  
Do you wanna be somebody else?  
Are you sick of feeling so left out?  
Are you desparate to find something more?  
Before your life is over_

"I just wish I could be like everyone else, but I can't! I just… can't."

I felt his hand on my shoulder as I sunk deeper into my pillows. I wanted to be anywhere but here.

"What's stopping you from being like everyone else? To actually relax and have a little fun with life?"

"Because my stupid emotions are…"

"…Dangerous… I know they are, Rae. So what? You can still have fun your way, but just with everyone else right by your side.

Oh yes, the best fun is reading with a bunch of buffoons in the room yelling at each other.

"I just want to go away… I don't want to be here, BeastBoy."

_  
Are you stuck inside a world you hate?  
Are you sick of everyone around?  
With their big fake smiles and their stupid lies  
Well deep inside you're bleeding  
  
_

"No you don't, Raven. I know you want to be here, I know you want to have some fun, and I want to have fun right a long with you."

"No, you don't. Stop lying to me."

"I'm not lying, Raven! That's another thing. You have to learn to trust the world a little bit more, to trust us more, to trust yourself."

_  
No you don't know what it's like  
When nothing feels all right  
You don't know what it's like  
To be like me  
  
_

I did the thing I hated to do the worst. I started to cry, and right in front of him! This would make matters worse… I wish I were never born… I wish I could just die right in front if him. I bet that would make him guilty for at least a few years.

But Then, I felt something nudge against my stomach. I looked down to see BeastBoy in his kitted form, rubbing against my stomach. No one can resist the kitten face.

"BeastBoy… please, don't do this…"

_  
To be hurt  
To feel lost  
To be left out in the dark  
To be kicked when you're down  
To feel like you've been pushed around_

He morphed back to his real form, and crept up closer to me. "Do what, Raven?"

I looked down and tried to wipe the tears that started to form in my eyes. "You're making me feel guilty…"

"Hey, at least I made you feel something…"

_  
To be on the edge of breaking down  
But no one's there to save you  
No you don't know what it's like  
Welcome to my life  
  
_

I looked back at my tear-stained pillow, and clenched at it tightly. "I tried opening up to someone before, remember? That got me in a deep world of hurt. You think I wouldn't trust anyone else after that? Did you?"

"You keep forgetting that you're not the only one who's been betrayed before, Raven. I have too, but I've moved on, and I think you should too."

_  
No one ever lied straight to your face  
No one ever stabbed you in the back  
You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be okay  
Everybody always gave you what you wanted  
Never had to work it was always there  
You don't know what it's like what it's like_

"Terra was different. She actually cared about you. She died to help protect you. She loved you."

I sat up and turned my back to him, and dragged a pillow with me. I clenched it tight as the memories came back to me. A horrible dragon from one of my books betrayed me to thinking he was a young wizard trapped in a book I was reading. He conned me into releasing him into the real world, to wreak havoc on the city. After that happened, I really didn't want to open up to anyone else except myself. _  
  
To be hurt  
To feel lost  
To be left out in the dark  
To be kicked when you're down  
To feel like you've been pushed around_

I then felt arms wrap around me. They dragged me back into something hard, yet warm. The arms squeezed harder around me, as I looked up to see BeastBoy holding me. I knew it was wrong, but I didn't want him to let go. His embraced actually felt good. I held on to his arms as he began to rock me back and fourth, as I let my tears stream down. I then broke down, right then and there. The tears came so fast and hard, that I even started to sob. Real nice, Raven. Real nice.

"Raven, I don't want you to be alone anymore. I don't want you to live your whole life in darkness. If you want me too, I can help save you… help bring you back." I started to calm down a bit, but not much. Maybe I can give life a second chance.

_  
To be on the edge of breaking down  
But no one's there to save you  
No you don't know what it's like  
  
_

I released his grip from around me, and looked him in the eye. I sniffed a little bit as I adverted my gaze down to the bed. "I'm sorry, for everything I've done. If it isn't too late, I would like to go out for some pizza now…" BeastBoy smiled as he took my hand and lead me out of the room. I stopped and looked at my book that was lying all crimpled on the floor. BeastBoy went over and tired the best he could to fix it.

"Did you want to bring this along?" He handed me the book as I held it in my hands. I looked at it, and looked back at him. "Nah…" I threw the book over my shoulder as we walked out, hand in hand, forgetting to put the door back on its hinges.

_  
Welcome to my life _

well, that's that I guess. I was listening to this song, and thought it would make an awesome songfic! . I apologize for any word or grammar mistakes that I made, or that my checker didn't catch. Any who, I thought a nice little Ra/BB Fic would be a nice break from the Resurrection vibe… and from the made reviewers who want me to revive Robin… **sigh… **anyway, please review and tell me what you thought… thanks .


	2. Can't Take It

-1**_Welcome To my Life_**

**Can't take It**

**A/n:** I do not own Teen titans, Beastboy, Raven, or any of the other characters… they all belong to their creators, DC Comics, yadda… lol… and to those who have already read this, I thank you so much for doing so! I decided to just delete the original Story and decided to add onto Welcome to My Life, since, well, this is kind of what happens next. Another Songfic, based on All American Reject's _Can't Take It_. Thanks, and enjoy!

------------------------------------------------------

The air was thick with fog and mist as Beastboy looked through the broken wall of Raven's room. Everything happened in slow motion, like someone pressed the paused button for two seconds on his life. She had finally snapped, and he couldn't understand what he did to make her do this.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Beastboy crept towards Raven's room and gently knocked on her door. He was hoping that she would join him on a grand all expense paid trip to the movie theater. Ever since that one incident that happened between the two of them, things have gotten better with her. She went out more with the rest of them and even smiled every now and then. Tonight, however, was different. Tonight was just going to be them.

He knocked, a little more forcefully, and then yelled out her name. "Raven? It's me, Beastboy. I Was wondering if you wanted to go to a movie tonight, my treat! "Goo Zombies, Revenge of the Nebula People 5" is playing and, Raven?" Beastboy swallowed and opened her door. He walked in, but couldn't see anything. The room was pitch black.

"Raven? Are you-"

"GET OUT!"

Beastboy stumbled a bit, but he didn't leave. He felt along the wall until his fingers fumbled upon a light switch. He flipped it on and a million little lights flickered on across her room, like tiny candles. He focused his attention over to where she was lying, sprawled across her bed. Her clothes were tattered and ripped, blood was oozing from her wrists and face, and tears were streaming down her face.

"R-Raven? What did you do to yourself!?"

"Don't come any closer!" She got to a sitting position on her bed as her eyes glew a bright white. Black energy started to form around her body, and her hands were shaking uncontrollably. Her hair was sprawled across her face, a few strands sticking to her sweaty forehead.

"Raven…. I thought, you were getting better, you were, happy…"

"I want to leave, Beastboy… leave everything and just, be alone. Like this."

_You speak to me  
I know this will be temporary  
You ask to leave,  
but I can tell you that I've had enough_

"Raven… I can't handle anymore of this!" Beastboy crept closer to her, but she held her hand up again, this time with more strength and power swirling around her.

"I can't stand all of this team work crap, Beastboy. You're trying to get me more involved, more social towards the others. They make me sick, you make me sick, I-"

"You don't mean that Rae… you've lost a lot of blood and your delusional, you need-"

"Help? No thanks, especially from you."

Beastboy's heart fell apart right then and there. His chest was throbbing, his face was flushed, and he could feel the hurt creeping up to his eyes. "I can't handle you anymore Raven. You keep changing, I don't know whether to hate you or to love you." Raven didn't move from her position on her bed, but Beastboy took a few steps closer to her. "You can't do this, Raven. Your little pity party is over, I'm done feeling sorry for you. I can't stand you right now."

_I can't take it  
This welcome is gone and  
I've waited long enough to make it  
and if you're so strong  
you might as well just do it alone  
And I'll watch you go_

Beastboy turned and walked away. He was sick and tired of Raven's little moods. At times he was so mad at her that she and just go a head and leave the Titans, it wouldn't be his problem, it would be hers.

Raven's eyes grew wide as she watched him go. She muttered something under her breath as black energy swirled around his body. His shock was noticeable as she pined him against a wall.

"Raven! What are you doing?!"

She held a hand out as she controlled the swirling magic. She crept out of her bed, blood dripping down her face and from her wrists. Beastboy's eyes widened in complete shock: she looked so pale and so fragile, he was afraid that she was going to collapse.

"I didn't want you to see me in this state. I-I'm scared."

"Of what!?"

Raven looked into his eyes as they filled with tears. "I, I don't know. I can't live here anymore Beastboy, I can't pretend anymore." Raven looked away and lowered her head so he couldn't see her weakness. "I'm afraid to tell you all I need to tell you."

_Step up to me_

_I know that you've got something buried  
I'll set you free  
You set conditions, but I've had enough_

Beastboy was furious at this point. He tried to transform into the biggest animals he could think of, to escape. He didn't want to hear all of this. After a while he got tired and just gave up. "Raven, don't be afraid to tell me things. I care about you so much raven, I-"

"Shut up!" Raven tightened her grip on him as his breath escaped from his lungs. Her tears were coming down her face fiercely, and now her entire body was shaking from pain.

"Raven… I-I love you."

Raven's eyes grew wide as she released her grip from around him. He fell with a thud to the floor, and he just lied there, motionless. She knelt down beside him and touched his back with her hand. It glew back as a white light surrounded his body.

"I'm sorry, Beastboy. I-I can't take this anymore."

_I can't take it  
This welcome is gone and  
I've waited long enough to make it  
and if you're so strong  
you might as well just do it alone  
And I'll watch you go_

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Beastboy closed his eyes and held back the tears that were forming in this eyes. When he woke up, she was gone. There was a huge hole in her wall, and a note laying on the floor. It was covered with blood and tears, and had a very sloppy but still legible "_Love is for the weak._" He held the note in his hand and scrunched it up into a ball. Her leaving, her being in pain, her cutting herself, for some reason, he thought it was all his fault. He couldn't save her, and now he would have to deal with it for the rest of his life.

He felt a slight chill as a small breeze blew through the room. He shivered as he moved closer to the hole. It was snowing outside, which was extremely odd weather for this time of year. He didn't want her to leave, he needed her to stay here, with him.

_Come back home, won't you come back home?  
You step in line, you got a lot to prove  
It comes and goes  
Yeah, it comes and goes  
A step in time, yeah it's a lot to move_

Raven looked at him from the roof of the Tower. She could see him, the tears running down his face, the hopelessness and failure he was emitting was so strong it made her want to puke. She didn't want this, she didn't need this. She wanted to be far away from people, especially the Titans, especially Beastboy.

She wanted to seclude herself, to bury herself in the ground and just rot there. She winced as she felt the cold against her cuts and sores. She welcomed the pain into her body, and she welcomed the cool feeling of the snow from above. She was just so sick of it all, of her feelings and emotions. Having fun with her friends, actually enjoying herself, it made her want to puke even more then seeing Beastboy standing there. She had nothing left inside of her to give, and now she was just tired.

_I know this will be temporary_

_I know this will be temporary  
I know this will be, but I've had enough_

_She'll come back, I know she will. She's just going through some weird demon phase. She'll come back and apologize, and then we'll go to that movie and all will be forgiven._ Beastboy fell to his knees and watched as the snow fell onto the bay. He knew that this wasn't true, that he had lost her for good this time, but he was going to wish and pray for her return, like a little school boy wishing for a new bike on a falling star.

Raven pulled her cloak over her head and transformed into her Raven form. She spread her wings and flew away from the tower, from Beastboy. Blood was falling from her wings and dripping into the bay. She was falling apart, on the inside and outside, and she honestly couldn't care less. The snow melted against her feathers as she flew deep into the city.

_I can't take it  
This welcome is gone and  
I've waited long enough to make it  
and if you're so strong  
you might as well just do it alone  
And I'll watch you go_

Beastboy perked his head up when he heard the sound. The siren was going off, and there was trouble in the city. He could hear the footsteps outside the door, running to the main room. He heard a knock at the door, and then heard Cyborg's voice.

"Come on, Rae. We need to get going here! Hey Star, did you find BB?"

Beastboy couldn't imagine life without Raven, without teasing her, hugging her, fighting by her side. He cried a few more tears before dropping Raven's note to the ground. It rolled out of the Tower and into the bay below. Beastboy looked back at the door, and then back at the bay. He transformed himself into a Raven and flew out of the Tower. He went in the direction of the forest, as he flew away from all the pain, the tears, and all the hate. He flew away from the past, and he flew away from her.

_I can't take it  
This welcome is gone and  
I've waited long enough to make it  
and if you're so strong  
you might as well just do it alone  
And I'll watch you go_

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh my gosh, I am not used to writing songfics. This is my first songfic since Welcome to my Life (which this story is set after) Anyway, I was reading it and I did kind of rush this one, and the lyrics don't really go well with some of the text, but after I heard this song I had to write a songfic for it! It's called Can't Take it from The All American Rejects (It's from their Move Along Album) ANYWAY Thank you so much for reading, and please review! (Sorry if this seemed rush or sappy, I was having a bit of writers cramp at the end )

**This is kind of a side note, but thanks to everyone who reviewed Welcome to my Life! I was seriously thinking about turning it into a story, but I thought I would end it with this sequel. I hope you all enjoyed it! And if anyone is completely confused by my comments… lol, I am confused too.. Anyway, I hope you liked it!! **


End file.
